What I've Been Up To

Last Wednesday was my let's get back at it buckle down day.  I've been doing GREAT and I feel really good.  My eating has done a complete 360 and all that is going into my body are foods in their natural state (for the most part) and I have not eaten boxed or prepackaged meals since.  I have also increased my water intake back up to where it should be.

It hasn't been all rosy colored, day 3 sucked.  I didn't feel well, I think it was sugar withdrawal.  Could have been wine withdrawal too. :-)  I am giving up my wine for two weeks and then it's back to a glass of red a day at most.

I can't believe the difference, but then again I can, I've been here before.  It makes me wonder WHY would I want to feel the other way?  I was also wondering how come I hadn't been cooking more? My hubby and I both love to cook and we both agree it tastes way better than going out.  I'm sure that it's a time/lazy thing, but I'm gonna make the time.

The only thing that I could be doing better at the moment is getting more physical activity, but I blame the books!  I've been sucked (willingly) into the 50 Shades series and it's been hard for me to even get the regular daily chores done.  I'm about 1/2 way through the last book, so the end is near, then no more excuses.

I updated my weight loss ticker at the bottom today and it now reflects my 39 pound loss as of today.  I go to the doctor on Friday for my follow-up and lab results, so I'll let you know how that goes. 


Right now I'll just keep plugging along...

Happy and I Know It

One thing I know for sure after being on diets for what seems my whole life, the ups are really up and the downs are way down. There never seems to be anything in the middle. When you are on a good week or a great loss you're awesome, let's just face if, the bomb! However, when you're not doing so well or gain you totally suck!

This is something I struggle with and after reading so many blogs I know that I am most definitely not alone. I read them and wonder why that person is being so hard on themselves, after all they're human and they are at least still tryng to be healthy. I realize that I need to cut myself some slack too! A very hard thing to do, but how I wanted this journey to go.

Believe it or not right now I am on a high. Ive been eating good, feeling great, and the scale this morning told me that I am awesome. That is what I WAS going to post about, but after watering all my flower (relaxed thinking time for me) I realized I don't want to get ahead of myself. I AM happy, proud, and feeling good...so I am going to run with it and let it carry me while it can. I am going to embrace the "easy" days with all I've got, but I am also going to acknowledge the bad. Realizing I too am human and maybe sometimes I just need a moment. Hopefully not a two month moment next time.

Plugging Along

While I am not breaking any land speed records here, I do feel like I am moving forward. It's been a busy week with a lot of activity...Yard work, bike rides, and tonigh a great match of four square with the family. My eating has been a LOT better this last week, not great, but a definite improvement. I lost two pounds, getting me within four pounds of where I was, so I am happy with that. Tomorrow I buckle down for another charge forward.

I saw the following on Pinterest and it rang true...

Source: Uploaded by user via Wendie on Pinterest

Here is to another great and active week.

I Went To the Dr. & the Dr. Said...

Yesterday I went and established myself with a doctor. Pretty sure it's my first regular doctor since my pediatrician, well outside of the girly doc. We talked about past health of course, but we also talked about me trying to lose weight. Of course he's all aboard on that front, but what I really liked about him is he was REAL. No smug remarks like I've been given before such as, "It's all about calories in and calories out!". Like we all don't know that...just like we all know drugs are bad for us, doesn't mean it stops us all.

I really did like him and the suggestions he had. I totally felt that if what I try doesn't help, he'll be there with more ideas/options. He also sent me toady to get my blood taken so that we can check certain risk factors I have and get a baseline on the other stuff. He did do one thing wrong though, he happened to mention that I was getting of the age where we were going to need these baseline numbers. The nerve...me of a certain age! Ha!

I think that all the blood they took today, 4 mason jars full...ok just 4 viles, but still...took the oomph right out of me. Is that possible? I even took a nap, something I NEVER do!

Going to bed now and praying for more energy tomorrow.

A Little Behind

Last Tuesday I weighed-in and I guess I'm a little behind in posting. Speaking of a little behind...wish mine was. (Sorry I couldn't resist.). The results were good, I lost 3 of the 5 pounds that I had gained. I'm afraid to say though that I acted like it gave me permission to not try as hard. This last week has been less than stellar and I really want pull my head out of my "little" behind.

I was really busy this weekend redecorating my oldest daughter's room and now I am SORE. I have to do the partial lower then drop on the toilet, you know the one because we've all been there before. Anyway, last night after my daughter saw her room we did go for a small bike ride. I didn't think I was gonna be able to do it, considering my legs and all, but it actually helped loosen them up. Who would've thought! By 3 AM though they were not loose. After I waddled to the kitchen for some ibuprofen I was able to go back to sleep.

So long story short, between my less than stellar week and the incredible soreness, I don't hold out very much hope for this weeks weigh-in. No discouragement though...it was all me and like I've said before, I will not give up! Even though I am sore, it's not nearly like I use to get. This tells me there has been some forward progress and for that I am proud!!

Dieter's Prison

Whenever I put myself on a strict "diet" I always feel deprived, like I've had something taken away from me. My own little dieter's prison! I do well in the beginning, watching my behavior, then all hell breaks loose. I rebel like I am trying to prove a point, but to whom I am not sure. I end up only hurting myself and right back where I was trying to escape from.

That is why I am trying to do things differently this time. Nothing has worked in the past. It's time to change my ways. There is only one problem...that old me, that old mindset, it is still lurking in there. The one who says all or none. The one who berates me for screwing up. The one who expects perfection. I'm trying to deal with her, but she is strong and has been with me for a very long time. All I know for sure is that I will never stop trying.

Source: colorlines.com via meshDETECT on Pinterest

I have a friend who really is in prison (if you must know it's for embezzling) and sometimes I admit I'm jealous. Only of the weight loss, don't get me wrong. She went in at 215+ I believe and when I talked to her the other day she was down to 158. Maybe there needs to be a REAL dieter's prison. A place you're sent when you treat your body, your temple, without regard. It is a crime unto you, is it not? Only, I'll need a house keeper and a nanny while I'm gone...

Embarrassed

I am sitting here eating (steamed carrots, cauliflower, & sugar snap peas) thinking that I need to post to my blog. And I am not sure if you noticed or not, but the posting has been a bit infrequent lately. Then it just hit me....I am embarrassed!!

Embarrassed that I've failed gained weight. It's sent me into the crazy diet thought process land. You know the one.... I'll do it tomorrow, one last cheat, might as well I was already bad, well tomorrow is the 4th better wait till after that...

I've decided right now that I WILL NOT be embarrassed. Besides, those who really know me know that I really don't care what others think. Maybe I was just embarrassed at myself? Well no more! I've still lost weight, my activity level is definitely improving all the time, and I know how to do this.

Here is my most current weigh-in, because who knows when I last posted it... +5 lbs for a total of -29.2 lbs.

Now if you'll excuse me I am going to finish my veggies and get on with it!

Yesterday

Yesterday I tried two new things.

The first was Map My Walk. I only went for a very short walk because the mosquitos were trying to carry me and the baby away. There was a small glitch in my route recording too...apparently I am a world record holder with just over a 2 minute mile. Not sure what went wrong, but I'll try it again. Anyone else use this app?


The second thing I did was go for a bike ride with my entire family. I was in the lead, so I kept pushing myself to go harder. Didn't want them waiting on ol' mom. I also used Mapping My Walk (Ride) with a little more success than earlier. No records on the bike. What I haven't figured out yet though was why I had to pull the baby trailer?

Our Rides

Baby's New Helmet

Still struggling with the eating, but I'm still trying...and I am still moving!