Saturday, May 5, 2012

More Randomness

I woke up today really mad at myself and disappointed.  Then I realized that it was all just a dream.  I had dreamt that I was having the "I don't really care, what's the point, it's just one meal" attitude.  It seemed so real!  When I took a step back I realized that I was having these thoughts for real a lot this week.  I didn't act upon them and I have eaten the correct amount of calories all week, but I have pushed it to the utmost limit.

The problem could be that I have been extremely busy this week.  I've got stuff going on personally with family and have tried to make time to help and do what I can.  I've also been volunteering at my kid's school for a fun walk on Friday and a big meet the teacher sort of  carnival bash tonight.  All this on top of the normal things I do and my big craft room redo/reorganization.  I've been allowing myself to get too hungry in between meals.  That is when those thoughts creep into my head and I have to watch myself really closely until I get some food into me.  I've made it so far, but maybe my subconscious is telling me that I need to check it out a bit closer before it goes too far.

I think I need to take some time next week to focus on me and my journey.  To remind myself that I can live my life right now how I want it to be in the future.  I may not be as fit as I want or weigh what I want to right now, but I will be there someday if I live today like I already am. 

Do what you always do and get what you always got...NO MORE!!

1 comment:

  1. Sounds like God is giving you a few days rest; which you need! He does that to me when I get to busy and crazy and feel I just don't have time. Praying this is a much better week all the way around!