Wednesday, November 28, 2012

Help Me I'm Melting and Other Randomness

Yesterday I walked around with this feeling that could only be explained as melting.  Not as in "the weight is just melting off", more accurately explained in terms of a candle melting and dripping, sliding, and mushing into a heap.  That's kinda how I feel in my skin at the moment.  I LOVE my progress, my smaller clothes, my smaller me...I'm having issue with the skin.  Some days are better and some are worse. Such is life.

I've been tired and not feeling well, which I'm sure explains some of the downer skin drama, and I find it the most difficult time to keep motivated.  All I can think about is chicken noodle soup, but without the broth....aka a big ol' heap of white, starchy pasta!! Nom nom!!!  I haven't done it though!  I went to the Dr. for antibiotics today, so hopefully the feeling passes soon.  If it doesn't I might not be responsible for my actions. :-)

I did weigh-in yesterday, even though I did on Friday after Thanksgiving.  I'm super happy to report a loss of 1.2 for a total of 84.4 pounds.  Now to just get to feeling better so I can keep plugging along.

Friday, November 23, 2012

Two Down...

Well Thanksgiving is over and I made it.  Something else to add to my list of thankfulness!  I allowed myself 2 items I normally wouldn't eat out of what seemed like hundreds of those options.  I limited the amount too, just because I could have some didn't mean I needed to be stupid about it.  I made sure to have a large salad shortly before going, which I am sure helped.  I'm not going to say it was totally easy, but I also didn't feel entirely deprived.  Afterwards I'm positive the mental outlook was better than the alternative, for that I am extremely proud.

Later in the evening I was jonesing for some crack food, but I ate my leftover salad and drank some water.  Truly not what I wanted in the moment, but it IS what I wanted this morning and now I'm over it.  Since I didn't post my loss on Tuesday like I normally try to do, I'm greatful to be able to do it today... the day after Thanksgiving.  My weight was even down today from yesterday!  Without any further ado, my loss since my last weigh-in post is 2.8 lbs for a total of 83.2 lbs.

Halloween and Thanksgiving survived, now the Christmas season is calling my name....

Thursday, November 15, 2012


I've been reading all these blogs and Facebook statuses where people are posting what they are thankful for.  While I find it nice to read a lot of positive things (especially on Facebook) I have to admit that my first reaction was that it's kinda silly.  I immediately thought that I am thankful for ALL of my life and don't need to point out individual parts of it for a month.

All of the above is still true, but I found myself walking around taking note of silly little incidents where I was thankful.  Maybe that is the point of all these random posting, to get us thinking.  I've decided to jump on the bandwagon and blog about what I am thankful for, but I'm going to limit mine to a single post.  Also, while I am incredibly thankful for my family, friends, and life in general I am going to single out some of the random thing that have popped into my mind lately.  Here goes!

I am thankful:

  • To be able to stand up and get out of the bathtub without a crane anymore.
  • For the new found energy dropping my weight has given me.
  • For the time sitting on my baby's bedroom floor playing toys, then getting up without the 45 point turn.
  • To be able to squat down and help my kids and then FINALLY be able to just stand back up.
  • For the people willing to come up to me and tell me they notice a difference in me and encourage me to keep going. (Which after 80+ pounds has only been 3 people & family doesn't count)
  • For the memories I have of the loved ones I've lost. They make the sadness sometimes brought on by the holidays so much easier.
  • VERY thankful, for the boxes of smaller clothes stashed in my closet, because without them I might be naked.  I will assume you're thankful for this one too!
  • For my husband and his job and everything it provides us with.
  • For my hairdresser who I don't see nearly often enough, but she still treats me like I'm her best customer ever.
  • For the tough times (this is NOT an invitation for more) which make the good times so much better and treasured.
  • To not be carrying around my 11 year old daughter everywhere I go.  She weighs less than what I've lost and that perspective is overwhelming.
I'll leave you with this weeks weight loss numbers....
This week: -0.6 lbs
Total: 80.4

Wednesday, November 7, 2012

Talking Food and Weigh-In

I don't talk a lot about my actual food or diet here specifically for a couple of reasons.  What works for one person is not always the answer for another.  Even my doctor says that there are millions of diets and combinations out there, not all good or bad, you just have to find what works for you.

Another reason for not "talking food" is the compassion one feels for what works for them.  I do not want someone to tell me what I am doing wrong when what I am doing right now is working for me.  I do not want to doubt myself, this is hard enough without that.  As long as my doctor is on board that's all that matters to me.

Don't get me wrong, I respect people's compassion because I get that way too.  Only in my case I sometimes call it obsession. :-).   It's hard for me to not run around screaming from the mountain tops about what and how I am doing.  It's hard not to share what makes me feel better, but it's me it's working for.   I do not understand your addictions or your issues with food.  I only understand mine.  My trigger is not your trigger, nor is my struggle the same as yours.

What I can offer though is support and understanding.  While I may not have the same specific struggle as someone else, I do share the "addiction".  Whether that be food, tobacco, or even exercise I GET the struggle and treasure the support.

Now for the weigh-in part, this week I lost 3 pounds bringing my total to 79.8 pounds. Halloween down, the rest of the holidays to go!  I'm working on staying conscious not obsessive and allowing myself to be human.  This journey is about so much more than food and pounds lost, it's about being nice to me too.