Friday, April 5, 2013

The Elephant in the Room

Let's talk, it's no secret that I've been struggling. It might be a bit of a secret HOW MUCH. It's kind of a "if I don't have anything good to say..."

I've been wrestling with my inner self a lot and it's only gotten worse since I hurt my knees. Choices are not easy for me, they never have been. Ask my Momma about letting me pick out candy. I can't even decide if I want to go to the Dr. about my knee pain and they've hurt bad for two weeks. I'm a good "talker" and can find good reasons for all sides of just about anything. This makes it hard to rationalize and decide on ANYTHING! Once I make a decision, I'm in. But right now, I'm not feeling very "in".

I keep saying that I'm not going to give up! I don't think I have, but I definitely question how HARD I'm trying. Where's the line between wishes/desires and reality? How does eating a box of Girl Scout cookies constitute trying? Give me a moment and I'm sure I can justify it. See the problem here, no?!?!

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